Here are the most frequently asked questions which I hope covers the list of questions you may have. I hope you find it clear and informative. It covers the most asked about questions from potential clients, including full service costs. It also cover topics that many introduction agencies don't tell you about, such as finding partners as we get older, how the majority of male and females choose partners, to the type of people the agency attracts. Your guarantee with regards to introductions and the cool off period once you engage the agency, should you change your mind. Anything more you want to know, please call me: 0845 226 3189
1. WHAT MAKES YOU DIFFERENT TO OTHER AGENCIES? Being pro-active and not depending on the limitations of a data-base of members, means the agency can be more selective when choosing potential matches for it's clients. Pro-actively searching ensures better quality matches, in addition to this, the service is not restricted by an imbalance of male and females, which membership agencies frequently experience, females to males, can be as high as 70%-30%.. It can also mean, females in their early forties, are more likely to be introduced to males a lot older than themselves. Mother nature has dictated that males in general choose partners approximately 10 years younger than themselves, therefore if a membership agency has less males than females, plus, males not choosing females over forty, it can present a problem for the female. I have a client from a well known London introduction agency who was only introduced to males fifty five plus, when she is only forty two. This is why pro-actively searching doesn't have such limitations. * Please note the agency is not mainstream, nor for those who want a mass market, conveyor belt type dating service, similar to online dating. The service is strictly for those who want an individual, bespoke, personal and confidential service built around their own personality and criteria.
2. HOW DOES YOUR AGENCY WORK? The agency provides a unique, tailor-made ' search and selection service'. Each client receives individual attention and all searches, selection and vetting is carried out by me. The founder of the agency, Jill Rhodes-Harvey. Once you have engaged the agency you are assured of meeting only attractive people of quality with a similar lifestyle and life goals.
3. WHAT TYPE OF PEOPLE, AND HOW OLD DO YOU NEEED TO BE TO ENGAGE YOUR SERVICES? Successful, attractive professional people, either in traditional professions, investment bankers, doctors, lawyers, the military, entrepreneurs, television and the media. People who are discerning and attractive, who seek a real alternative to conveyor belt dating with a high level of individual attention. Any age from 30 to 75+. You must be single, divorced, widowed legally separated, or at least proof you reside is separate homes and your intention is to remain so. This must be made known to the agency before being engaged. The agency ONLY provides introductions for the purpose of finding genuine long term relationships .
4. WHERE DO YOU PLACE SEARCHES? Marketing and advertising is paramount, and include major quality newspapers, Private Eye, Prospect, Financial Times, Spectator to many specialist magazines, depending on searches. (This is NOT an exhaustive list of publications) Each client has a different criteria, therefore depending whether it's a broad spectrum or specialized search, determines how searches are made. Any other available resource to pool matches is down to the agency to use it's discretion to secure suitable introductions. * Please note - Searches cannot be time based due to publications being used, either monthly or weekly, advertising space being available, your search criteria and requirements, age and when responses are received. Meeting and interviewing those people, vetting etc. This is a highly personalized service, so on average it's between 3-4 months for a first introduction.
5. HOW DO YOU SELECT POTENTIAL MATCHES? All potential introductions will be attractive, well mannered, well presented, articulate, intelligent, be financially secure, have common interests, hobbies, background, lifestyle and seeking the same relationship goal of the client the agency is searching for.
6. HOW DO I ENGAGE YOUR SERVICES? Just call me on 0845 226 3189, so we can arrange a time to meet and chat about the type of person and relationship you're seeking. If I don't feel I can find what your looking for, or if I feel there could be difficulties with your search, then I will tell you honestly, and explain the reasons.
7.WHO DO YOU PROVIDE A FREE CONSULTATION FOR? Anyone genuine in their request for a FREE consultation. It's important before a consultation you understand the service is not ' Mass market ' produced, but bespoke, as it generally takes about three hours of agency time to provide free consultations. This means other clients or meeting potential matches have to be assigned to another time. You must also be professional, well presented, polite, articulate, financially secure and seeking a long term relationship. So only genuine requests please. If you wish to cancel once you've made an appointment, please give as much notice as possible, not on the same day unless unavoidable, this enables me to keep the consultations free
8. ARE THERE ANY REASONS THAT I MAY NOT FALL INTO THE STANDARD SEARCH SERVICE LEVEL? Yes, but this is not down to the agency making these decisions, but common stereo typing by both male and females, meaning searches would attract a smaller pool of individuals. For example, males under 30 years of age or less than 5'7" in height, or over 50 and under 5'7". Males well above normal weight range for their height ratio. Females under 5'3" dress size 14 or females 5'9" +. Females over 47 years of age or dress size 16+. Men and women who have not had a long term relationship by the time they reach their 30's or 40's. I'm more than happy to discuss any of this with you, and perhaps discuss search methods for your specific situation. I have to make clear, these reasons indicated, are NOT down to the agency, but how people choose partners. I merely present the facts as life dictates.
9. WHERE DO YOU MEET CLIENTS? I meet potential clients either in Bicester, just off the M40, junction 9 about 50 minutes by car from London, or by train if you prefer, to Bicester North. If you choose Oxford, we would meet at Browns, Woodstock Road. Both venues are chosen for their relaxed atmosphere which encourages open and friendly communication. If driving, Bicester is by far the best option, it has plenty of free parking. * Please note people have to come to me, so I can combine meeting potentional introductions for my clients, potential new clients and meet established clients if need be. If I were travelling to different regions this would not be possible.
10. WHAT ARE THE FEE STRUCTURES? Search fees vary due to the specifications of each individual client, their age, whether male or female, and what they're seeking in a potential partner. Wanting to meet someone from a particular profession ONLY as an example will mean different search methods, and pooling people from smaller groups. ALL fees are one off payments, NO VAT or monthly service charge.
THE STANDARD SEARCH SERVICE - For those who don't have a RIGID criteria, yet still want the guarantee their introductions will be university educated, with a professional career, similar background, lifestyle, and the same relationship goal. If you want to SET a certain height, profession, region, age, etc, then the Select Service covers such specifics. ( As a rule, male responses to females may be up to 10 yrs older for the standard search service).*Fees are from £1,895 to £3,595 for broad spectrum searches. Applies to females 5'3" to 5'8", up to size 14. Males 5'8" + normal height/weight range. YOUR own criteria will be discussed at interview and assessed accordingly, you will be given a fee structure dependent on your OWN search. All fees are 'from', as each person has a different criteria and search requiremnts.
Standard Search -Male and Females Age 50 + from: £3,000 - Standard FEES for Males under 35 from: £2,595 - Under 5'8" From: £ £2,995. Standard FEES Females 5'9"+ or dress size 16 + from: £3,000 * SEE FAQ 11 for further explanation on additional fees
INTERNATIONAL SEARCH FEES- From £4000 depending on where you live, your criteria, your age etc for finding a potential partner. I have clients in Denmark, Italy, USA and Hong Kong.
THE SELECT SEARCH SERVICE From £4,000 for male or females who want to meet someone younger by 10 years or more, OR wish to include TWO rigid search criteria to their personal search. This might include an interest, region, age, ethnic background, particular height. Any criteria can be discussed. The select service provides more control for the client if certain aspects of a partner are vital. Additional advertising is required to pool a more defined or minority group of people. * Please note - Age, height, dress size for females - Height/weight ratio for males, is still taken in to account when proposing a fee schedule. Additional fees of £1000 is added for each search criteria you wish to set above the two included.
11. WHY ADDITIONAL FEES FOR CERTAIN SIZES/AGES? As I say, the agency makes NO judgment whatsoever with regards to these factors. Experience and evidence has shown that men and women choose partners * in general * by a certain criteria. It's honest to pass on the facts before engaging ANY agency, not just mine. There is no point in an agency telling you, a male under 5'7" will attract the same response as a male 5'10"+, he won't, as a woman of 5'3" size 16, or a woman of 6'0", won't. The agency is relaying the facts, not making the rules. The agency cannot change human nature, therefore it is better for a client to know and understand what he/she can expect from the outset. I just present the facts. EVERYONE has the potential to find a partner who will love them the way they are, I'm merely demonstrating, that searches for such examples may have to be widened. I always provide genuine, open and honest guidance.
12. HOW DO YOU SELECT MY INTRODUCTIONS? By careful matching against your personal search criteria, to reach at least 80/85% of what your seeking, including, realistically as possible, physical appearance, height, education, background, lifestyle, social standing, interests, hobbies and of course relationship goal, so you know when you meet, you already have the foundations for a relationship if the chemistry is there. I cannot gauge sex appeal, chemistry or a sense of humour, this is a very personal thing. I have found that if the majority of what you seek, is evident in both parties, then you are more likely to connect. Once an introduction is put forward, the match will have been interviewed, vetted, including background checks through a ' search company'.
13. DO I GET TO SEE PHOTOGRAPHS? I prefer people NOT to choose an introduction by a photo, as a photo can be totally misleading. A photo can lead people to make a decision by ' ONE' photo, when of course, connecting with someone has a whole range of factors to consider. Limiting finding a lifetime partner to a photo, is not realistic. And with due respect it is the avenue online dating takes. This is where most people have gone wrong in the past, by picking a potential partner by their looks, commonly known as the 'Bumping in method' which often lends itself to discovering 3-6 months later you have nothing in-common, same relationship goal or the person is just not emotionally ready. I only attract quality attractive people. All introductions will be well presented, attractive, clean, well groomed, smell nice, have nice teeth, nails. High standards are considered highly important. However, if it's a case of seeing who you will be meeting before an introduction, opposed to choosing, by a photo alone, then I ask both parties if they are happy for their photo to be shown. Very few say no. Absolute confidentiality is assured to everyone.
14. WHAT IF I WANT TO DECLINE THE INTRODUCTION? You can of course decline an introduction, but I always advise a client to meet everyone who responds to their personal search. Firstly, the person who has come forward will have the qualities and attributes you seek, I guarantee at least 80/85% of the criteria. The person will be professional, educated, attractive, single and genuinely seeking a long term relationship. An introduction only takes 2-3 hours of your time, and therefore not only offers at best a potential date/partner, but at worse, a pleasant lunch/evening meeting who has a lot of the qualities you seek, which may help you to re-define what you feel is important in a partner. People often make the mistake NOT to date someone unless they knock them out physically on first sight..but if the majority of qualities and attributes are in tact it is worth meeting. Being knocked out by someone, with the WOW factor, rarely happens, and if people are seeking this, this may be restricting you finding that life partner.
15. HOW DO I MEET MY INTRODUCTION? I make all the arrangements, by being a go-between the two parties. This keeps the females personal details secure, and offers confidentiality. Once an introduction is agreed, I ask the female where she feels happy to meet, venue etc. I then relay this to the date, and not until the day of the meeting, do I provide mobile contact to both parties, just in case of traffic problems etc. NO addresses are ever given. I can also provide a ' phone masking number ' for your mobile, so that after the date, if you decided not meet again, the masked number can be deleted and you cannot be contacted. It's FREE.
16. ANY ADVICE FOR MEETING MY INTRODUCTION? Keep an open mind, and remember this can be a difficult time for both parties - Usually people are nervous, especially if they have not dated much recently. Everyone reacts differently on a first meeting, some will talk quite a lot, others may seem reserved. All perfectly normal and not an indication that it is not going well. The first meetings are almost like an interview, as you are both looking very closely at each other, for what you like or may not like. Therefore not as relaxed as if you met 2-3 times. So my advice is, unless you both really don't like each other - This rarely happens, in fact only once since 2005, meet a second or third time, so you see each other when your both relaxed.
17. IS THERE A CODE OF BEHAVIOR FOR AN INTRODUCTION? Yes, on your first and second date, you are considered to be an ambassador for yourself and the agency, and required to act in such a manner that the agency can be proud of. The agency always checks as far as possible that the male is genuine, and that he is fully aware this is not an escort service, but a genuine service for finding life partners, therefore a code is vital.
18. WHAT DETAILS DO YOU PROVIDE TO A POTENTIAL DATE? Age, date of birth, where you were born, education, university, physical stats, occupation, marital status, children etc and a summary of you as a person which will be created to ' interest ' the reader built around your details of your profile interview. It will also communicate what your seeking in a partner, interests, hobbies etc. I provide enough detail to enthuse the responder, but not too much, so if you meet there is PLENTY to ask and communicate on.
19. WHAT IF I'M BELOW AVERAGE HEIGHT OR OVER WEIGHT? From experience, searches produce slower responses and/or less responses, as the pool of people to come forward is smaller. However, results are very good, and certainly better than a data-base introduction agency, as they may not accept males * under 5'7", overweight, or females over 50 or size16+*. When searching, these* factors* are incorporated in to the search, therefore bringing forward those who are attracted to more shapely women, or males slightly shorter or who are rather more cuddly. This way you are confident that the person sitting in front of you accepts you for who you are.
20. HOW MANY INTRODUCTIONS CAN I EXPECT? This depends on who you are, how old you are and what your SEARCH CRITERIA is. Generally, unlimited introductions, meaning it depends on how many respond to your search - if 10 respond throughout your whole campaign, and they are all good matches, then you will receive all 10. However, it is unlikely that all would be right for you, or not who they say they are, not in your age range, or perhaps married. So I guarantee an absolute minimum of TWO quality introductions. When I propose a fee structure for you, I'm confident I can produce good results for you, however, if the agency should need to pay for additional searches, this is down to the agency and not you, due to the agency setting your fee structure.
21. DO I NEED TO TELL YOU IF I SMOKE OR I'M SEPARATED BUT NOT DIVORCED YET?
Yes, it is accepted that the agency and client will discuss search criteria, objectives, previous relationships and any details that may affect the service, agency, or introductions once engaged. If any information not given prior to engaging the agency later comes to light, would affect providing services/ introductions, the agency reserves the right to withdraw client services. If any client behaves in a manner that may affect the reputation of the agency, introductions, either, by not providing accurate information, or engages the agency whilst still married, this would be seen as very serious. The agency has a high standard, is discerning and wants to offer clients the highest possible quality service, but this can only be achieved if both client and agency adopt the same level of honesty and integrity. Free consultations are between the agency and the potential client only, unless notice is given prior to the appointment. Confidentiality is paramount.
22. WILL AGE MAKE ANY DIFFERENCE? Yes, it can, but it is not conclusive, just a realistic view that as we get older there seems to be less available suitable partners, but that is where an agency uses their experience to find those potential partners.
23. HOW SUCCESSFUL IS YOUR SERVICE? Generally, VERY....just over 60% success rate, as most of my clients are still dating after several months. Most on only two introductions, some only one. See client testimonials.
24. WILL THE SERVICE DEFINITELY WORK FOR ME? No I cannot guarantee this. I can only open up new opportunities for you to meet a much wider, more in-tuned selection of people than you are likely to meet without the agency. Life does not carry any guarantees, nor does doing absolutely nothing to create your fate....there is no guarantee you will bump in to someone, and over the age of 40 it becomes rare indeed. So engaging any form of introduction agency is one way to' guarantee' you are increasing your chances of meeting a partner.
25. CAN I FREEZE MY SEARCHES? Yes. If you meet someone once you've engaged the agency, you may FREEZE searches for up to 2 months. Which should give you enough time to decide if you want to date that person more long term. You may also FREEZE searches up to 2 months, in case of holidays/ work/illness. Please remember if searches have already begun, OR a suitable introduction has been found for you, and your not available 25. Cont.. to meet this person without informing the agency to freeze your searches, this will be considered an introduction, as advertising, searching, vetting and interview time needs to be accounted for.
26. IS YOUR SERVICE SECURE? I meet every new client, every potential introduction, and I insist on home addresses and telephone numbers, and photographs of every client. In addition to documentation to verify all information. You do need to take your own precautions after that - meet in a public place - do not get in to a car on a first/second date UNLESS you feel you want to - Do not give your home address - Do not go back to someone's home unless you know them well. The service cannot be held responsibility for any event, act, or accident arising from an introduction facilitated through the agency. Clients are required to take responsibility for their own safety.
27. HOW CONFIDENTIAL IS YOUR AGENCY? Very. I have high-profile clients from all professions including the media, so confidentiality is essential. I will never use the agency name on calls, messages on answer phones, I will just say it's Jill or Jill-Rhodes-Harvey.
28. DO YOU GIVE DISCOUNT? NO. Special offers are provided on occasion, if I receive discounts from advertising mediums, therefore I can pass this on to a client! I will also pass on a saving to a client who wishes to engage the agency a second time, but this saving will depend on various factors, main one being I do not have to interview or create a profile again. I will not offer you a discount to engage the agency when we meet, the fees are set to provide you the client, with best possible search service for your criteria. You are welcome to consider for a few days whether you would like to engage the agency.
29. WHAT IF I AM NOT HAPPY? ARE YOU A MEMBER OF AN AGENCY ASSOCIATION? YES-You are covered by AIIA - Association of Independent Introduction Agencies, formed for the smaller introduction agency. 1. If you are unhappy with any aspect of service with a member agency, please address your complaint in writing to the agency involved and allow them the opportunity to rectify the situation. 2. It is expected that member agencies will attempt to resolve any issues in the first instance, however if you cannot gain a fair and satisfactory response from the agency concerned please send a detailed letter outlining your complaint and copies of all correspondence both sent and received to the Association of Independent Introduction Agencies, so that the matter may be taken up on your behalf. 3. No complaints will be dealt with unless the agency concerned has been contacted in the manner as described in paragraph 1 and they have been given the opportunity to rectify the situation.
30. DOES NATIONALITY OR RELIGION MAKE A DIFFERENCE? Yes it can. It will be dependent on how fluent with English you are, or if you are seeking a partner from only a certain religion or ethnic minority. Just call for a chat and I will advise you honestly what difficulties may arise or exist.
31. WHAT IS THE DEFINITION OF AN INTRODUCTION? A suitable introduction is deemed to have been made once two clients have AGREED to a meeting. If you or a potential match withdraw from a meeting once it has been agreed/arranged, this is still considered an introduction, as this is not down to the agency the meeting has not taken place.
32. WHAT IF I CHANGE MY MIND AFTER ENGAGING YOU, WILL YOU REFUND MY MONEY? Yes there is a cool off period. If you change your mind within 5 days of engaging the agency you will be entitled to a FULL REFUND, LESS any costs already incurred, including and not exhaustive of the initial consultation, travel costs/travel time to consultation + administration charge of £75.00 to cancel services. Any work that has taken place already will be charged for, especially if searches have been placed.
33. WHAT EXPERIENCE DO YOU HAVE IN FINDING PARTNERS? After some considerable research into on and offline dating, I joined both types of agencies to see how they worked. I also met both male and females who helped compile my research over a two year period, which included how people usually choose partners. I have also written many dating and relationship articles, which have been published through various mediums. Just recently I provided the quarterly journal ELAN with dating advice, and a magazine for the over fifties which is being published in December 2007. I have also worked with BBC Radio Oxford several times, advising on relationships including a five part program on dating in later life.
34. HOW DO YOUR COSTS COMPARE WITH OTHER SEARCH SERVICES? Caroline Crowther Ambassador Search fees from £3000 for a basic search + a monthly service fee up to £50.00 per month. Berkeley Sweetingham fees start from £6000 plus an initial one-off registration fee, and a monthly service fee up to £50 per month. County Register-£9,000 for18 months service. Seaforthmatch ( Northern based agency) from £2995 - No Monthly Fee. ALL these agencies charge VAT which needs to be added to the fees above.
Jill Rhodes Harvey
Rhodes-Harvey Introductions
